Its Easy to Apply to New River Academy

* Sorry. I couldn’t decide on a title, so I just used both. Yes, it is twice as long as it needs to be. Yes, it took me twice as long to write, took you twice as long to read, and took me far too long just to make that decision.

Yesterday, as we stood waiting for the females in our group to get in the van so we could head to the river, the guys were amazed at how LONG it took the ladies to get ready. “What the hell are they doing?” “How can it possibly take them that long? They didn’t even load boats!” Ah.. the mysteries of women. How and why does it take us twice as long to get anything done? Or are we simply doing twice as much?

I have spent a significant amount of my life waiting for my Mother. Despite the fact that she wakes up well before anyone else, she is routinely the last person ready to go. I find it endlessly frustrating, and often wonder “what on earth takes so long?”  The problem is that no matter how many times we tell her we need to leave, she always manages to find one last thing that she NEEDS to do, RIGHT NOW, before we can possibly go anywhere. Even I seem to be ready before her. The problem with this, however, is that it sets off a chain reaction. If one person is doing something extra, the people that are already ready and waiting get bored or antsy, and take off, or find something else for themselves to do. Then everyone is late, and waiting on everybody else.

Unlike my mother, my problem, and that of many of the ladies I know and love, seems to be that it doesn’t take us that much longer to do something, it is that it takes us that much longer to decide whether or not do the thing, or how do to the thing in the first place.

As a female traveling primarily with males, I never cease to be amazed at how few things guys seem to need. Despite the fact that I am half the size of the majority of my male friends, my bag always seems to be twice as large. Mathematically, this would imply that I am traveling with 4 x as much stuff. How is that even possible? What on earth am I judging absolutely necessary to survival that clearly, is not?

Seeing how I agonize over what to bring and leave behind, this amazes me. I spend a week laying clothes out on the floor of my room, separated into piles of definitely bring, definitely don’t bring, maybe bring. (I know. You would think the pile of definitely don’t bring is overkill, but its nice to see what I decided not to bring. It makes me feel better about my overpacking.)

And yes. I recognize that I shamelessly overpack. This doesn’t mean I still don’t try to justify it. For example, I brought a hammock AND a tent to Chile. Clearly. One of the other teachers brought neither. (For the record, both have been used. And not just by me…)

You would think that for all my overpacking, I would be shockingly prepared for almost any situation. And I am, to an extent. I have an epi-pen (I’ve never had an anaphylactic reaction), loads of plasters, lotion, medical tape and a pharmacopeia of drugs. I also have tanktops, tee-shirts, longsleeve shirts, thin fleece, fleece vest, hoodie, hoodie without hood… and that’s not even counting my boating gear.

The problem becomes that while prepared, (I was a Brownie) I have too many choices. To justify having something, I have to use it, right? Wrong, considering how I wear the same shirt and spandex leggings everyday. The second problem is that I seem to be incapable of making these choices by myself.

We have all joked about how girls can’t seem to do anything by themselves, including go to the bathroom. And yes, this is often true. But bigger than having a bathroom buddy seems to be my need to think out loud, and solicit advice from everyone around me (regardless of how well I know them) before making a decision, especially one as important as “Should I wear my union suit today?”

Questions such as, “Should I run this rapid?” “Do you think I will be too warm if I wear a second fleece over my union suit?” Are simply ridiculous, because I need to be able to make them myself. I am the person who knows how cold I get, and need to be the one to decide how comfortable I feel running or not running a rapid. Basing those decisions off of what someone else is or isn’t doing isn’t practical or safe. I have a fear of being cold, so I wear an extra fleece over my union suit. (I have learned the hard way that this is rarely necessary. But hey, at least I’m not cold! )

The tendency for females to do things in groups inevitably slows everybody down. Ladies, do you see your male friends waiting for each other to get what they need to done? Cut the solidarity, make your own decisions, and  take care of yourself and your stuff first. Help somebody else by helping yourself.  And guys, next time you criticize how much stuff I have, or how long it takes me to do something, remember how many times you’ve “borrowed” something from me that you didn’t feel like bringing for yourself.

Its Easy to Apply to New River Academy